During the last couple of years I have learned a lot about myself, mainly, accepting who I am.
Learning to live and enjoy my life and fighting for what I believe in hasn’t been easy. To be honest, there have been times when I felt I should just give in and accept the notions and dogmas of everyone around me. For instance, my tears usually run down easily, this, to many people exemplifies weakness; however, I came to acknowledge that it is a sign of my strength. In fact, I believe now that the specific act of crying, show that I’m confident with displaying my inner state and it’s easier for me now to express my love, gratitude, fear, care and passion.
One of the defining moments in any relationship, whether between lovers, parents, children, siblings or friends is when you think you are going to lose them; that fear, makes you realize that they mean a lot more than you have imagined. For me- and due to the fact that everything is so dissimilar going on inside my rambling senseless head- that moment is when I discover that someone’s smile just lights up the shady corners in my heart and I find myself thinking about how they are doing long after I say goodbye . I do get attached easily to people and as much as I hate to admit, I do have a certain condition of over-protectiveness. I don’t want to share people close to my heart with others that might not have their best interest in mind. And I know that this is pretty lame or sick or you can call it whatever you like, but this is one of the feelings that now I ‘m comfortable in conveying. And I am learning to let it go, and to accept that people I love might be happier experiencing things on their own.
The other day, I discovered that I love a specific person a lot more that I thought, my over-protectiveness was kicking in, because I just wanted him to be safe with me, to hang out with me, to laugh with me and to have his last drink for the night with me. You see I wanted that person to spend time with me, not only because I enjoy his company, but also because I felt it’s my duty to keep him safe from any slight possibility of getting hurt.
That was the defining moment in my relation with izoo. The brother I’ve always wanted but never had up until now. I felt so much love that I wanted to let him go, to let him be happy and to let him be free. Here’s to you izoo…. you made my feelings flow, you’re worth more than a mention , you deserve a post for all the ways you made me express my secret battle to overcome being an over-protector.
happy odd one out 